Photography Competition

...Aha - thought that would make you look...

Yes indeedy, folks, the good burghers at The Friends of East Greenwich Pleasaunce are running a competition to coincide with their latest Summer get together on June 8th. After the last couple of washouts, let's hope they have better weather for their summer kneesup, because if you want to enter, you'll have to go along...


The exact stalls are, I'm told, yet to be decided, but will include the usual faves, which I'm assuming will include books, cakes and punch plus others, something for the kids and perhaps the local fire service.


But onto the comp. You need to get over to the Pleasaunce and start snapping now (well perhaps not quite now unless you like capturing artistic drips from ancient anchor-shaped gravestones...) The only rules are that it has to be all your own work and it has to be recognisably East Greenwich Pleasaunce. There will be a mystery prize courtesy of Ivor Howell Cameras in Westcombe Hill and entrants will be eligible for a planned exhibition at Viewfinder Photography Gallery in the Autumn.


Now - no sending the stuff to me, ok? I mean - yes - by all means send me pictures of anything you like (see my FAQs for how that works) but if you want to enter the competition, you need to bring the picture(s) along to the shindig on June 8th. If you have any questions about the competition please email pleasauncefriends@hotmail.co.uk

Greenwich Fair.

It feels a bit wrong to talk about a May Monday fair on one of the few May Mondays that doesn't have a holiday on it, but that's the way the Christian Moveable Feast crumbles. I almost missed this morning, having forgotten that Pentecost and it's old name Whitsun were one and the same festival, but I noticed just in time to be able to talk about the scandalous Greenwich Fair* that went on for centuries before the authorities closed it down.

This was the day when all of London seemed to flock here. It was a great leveller - toffs would rub shoulders (and heaven knows what else) with their servants, tradesmen with their customers, dockers with muckers, sailors with soldiers, and, of course, the criminal fraternity with practically anyone who didn't have their eye (and one hand) firmly on their valuables.

For the duration of the Fair, anything went. The place teemed with life - and the inhabitants, for the most part, took advantage of it. Houses would open up their front rooms as 'tea shops,' locals would hawk whatever they could to the hoardes of visitors and even the Greenwich Pensioners got in on the act by hiring out their telescopes so that people could 'look at St Paul's Cathedral.' They were, frankly, more interested in ogling the pirates hanging from the gibbets down at Blackwall.

Hawkers, sideshows, wax works, lurid theatrical entertainments - there were booths for anything the partying cockney could want, and as the years went on, the upper classes left them to it more and more.

They could get a tooth pulled or watch a prize fight. They could buy a trinket or dance a quadrille. They could hear a trumpet voluntary or get their fortunes told, watch wild beasts fight or drink a barrel of beer. They could visit Wombwell's Menagerie or any one of the dozens of alehouses on the Thames. They could 'meet' a nice young lady and if they were really getting on, that they could engage in a spot of tumbling together. He could even get himself a Scratcher to tease her with. (no - not some strange marital aid - it was little serrated wheel on a stick which you rolled up and down your victim's back. The noise it made sounded as though you'd ripped their clothes. Hilarious.)

By the Victorian age it was really getting out of hand. Charles Dickens described it as "a sort of spring-rash, a three day fever which cools the blood for six months afterwards." Nathaniel Hawthorne wasn't so charitable. The fair merely reminded him that "the common people of England, I am afraid, have no daily familiarity with even so necessary thing as a washbowl, not to mention a bathing tub."

The 'nicer' people of Greenwich, largely those who were moving into the smart new houses going up during the early 19th Century, agreed with him and started to campaign to get the fair closed down. At first the hawkers, tradesmen - and punters - took absolutely no notice. After the railways arrived, it got even more crowded - 200,000 people and more. The Greenwich elite got even more panicked and eventually, after a riot of drunken soldiers in 1850, the fair was suppressed in 1857.

So as we sit here on a May Monday morning, considering another week at work, have a care for the cockney lad and his lass enjoying one of the few days off they'd get a year...

* There was a fair at Easter and also in October. AD Webster reckons it was on 12th, 13th and 14th May and 11th, 12th and 13th Oct - but I find it hard to imagine that it would have always been on those exact dates.

The Iron Man

At last!

Lloyd Scott AKA The Iron Giant, reached The Cutty Sark - and Simon managed to snap him and his bucket-followers. I tried to catch up with the robot-road-runner but the traffic's backed up so far (presumably behind him) by now that I'm afraid the flaky old Phantom gave up.

He'll be well on his way to Deptford by now...

See Lloyd's website here

The Phantom's Proxy Marathon

Thank you sending me photos of the marathon, guys. I felt (almost) as if I were there - minus the freezing cold and the rain, of course...)

Kirsty's pics show the camaraderie that the marathon invokes. And I can see that by the time the runners passed Woolwich Road at least, they were all still wearing their costumes, smiling - and the sun was out.

Benedict was a little further up the way (though not that much) and experiencing a completely different marathon. He admits he was utterly freezing and that rain was threatening - so I owe him a big thank you for sticking it out long enough to get pictures.

Lloyd Scott and his Iron Man costume are taking it a step at a time and he won't be finishing 'til Friday (so it's possible we may see him yet) but Benedict did find a lady on stilts

At first I thought the guy behind her was flagging already - until I realised that he appears to be dragging a sandwich board.

And that's what I love about the London Marathon. All the others around the world seem to take themselves so seriously. We just arse about and have fun (if you can call wearing a filthy, smelly rhinoceros suit for 26 miles 'fun...')

I particularly liked this nurse...

...though I'm not convinced she would have approved of this naughty dog who's taken his head off (a surreal thought) and is enjoying a sneaky fag...

I'll email Lloyd Scott's team and see if they know when he's going to pass us. I don't hold out much hope for catching him this time, but I'll suggest he puts an estimated time on various points on his website for next year...

Snow-Blossom

Sorry folks - but just one more lot of wonderful snow pics. Indulge me - I wasn't there. These are from DeeBee and I love them because they will never make good Christmas cards. They are of the season - full of blossom, hope and spring-ness, while still reminding us to cast ne'er a clout (even though the May blossom is well and truly out. Something went a bit wrong there...)

So ok. No more snow pics for today at least (though do keep sending 'em - especially if you got any photos of that igloo...) I leave you with a spring Snow-Girly. As usual, click on her to make her bigger...

Dick Moy's Plaque

I may not have been able to make the unveiling, but Warren has sent me a pic. He took some for the Greenwich Society - so check out their newsletter for more info. I have found that they distribute a few copies in libraries, so if you're not a Greenwich Society member you can still read what they're up to - always interesting for their opinions on local planning proposals.

Spot the Flame

Yet another thing I missed over the weekend was the 'glorious' arrival of the Olympic Flame in London. Though as far as I can tell, it wouldn't have mattered where I was, I wouldn't have seen said flame as the number of police/security/sinister-looking-men-in-blue-tracksuits surrounding it totally obscured the view.

I did get to see the BBC's later coverage though, which I thought was a triumph of pragmatism. They had clearly designed it weeks, if not months, ago - with specially-composed theme music, uplifting stories of young athletes overcoming personal tragedy, frankly naff dress rehearsals by Grecian Nymphs, the lot, and then had to change it all when the day was spectacularly hijacked by protesters. I thought they interwove what was supposed to happen with what really went on beautifully, sitting precariously on the diplomatic fence with one eye on democracy, the other on being allowed by the Chinese to cover the Olympics later this year.

Even more interesting was ex-Blue Peter presenter Konnie Huq (never heard of her, m'self - well after my time...) on Today this morning talking about those sinister men in blue. She said she saw them scuffling with the police themselves earlier in the day and that no one knew who the hell they were. They barked orders at her, manhandled her and sound extremely heavy-handed in their treatment of everyone, including our own boys in blue. Presumably Chinese Secret Service. Sounds to me as though they were a hell of a lot scarier than the protester who pinched her flame.

Dazza tried to get down to Greenwich to get a glimspe of the flame arriving at the O2. It was a total waste of time acccording to him:


"It was so nice of 'them' to decide that the residents of this Fine Borough weren't important enough to warrant a view of said Torch. Not even a grinning/waving Ellen MacArthur to greet the 'Fans' who had lined both sides of the river. I would have thought that this would have been the best chance anyone would have got to see it without the ring of Chinese Blue, the Police Yellow and then The Black ring obscuring all but the hardiest of snappers..."


Dazza got a photo. Of sorts. Put a cross where you think the flame should be.



Did anyone actually see anything? I guess at least it made China look really bad everywhere except China, whose state-run TV station got a nice story about tractors instead.

Maybe this will inspire other countries.

Greenwich in the Snow

There in spirit, at least...

Would you Adam & Eve it? I go away for two days. TWO DAYS. And Greenwich becomes some kind of Snow Paradise - just for long enough for everyone to enjoy it before melting away to nothing for my arrival home.

My cab driver regaled me with stories of taking his kids tobogganing in four-inches of snowy loveliness (though judging from Benedict's photo, he may have been exaggerating...) but all I saw was the odd stubborn patch left on parked cars. Pah.

Luckily you have come to my rescue - thank you to Benedict, Mike and Ros...

So. Tell me - was it really as fab as my cabbie said? (I don't care if he was exaggerating by the way - he also gave me a top tip for a new place to check out, so I'll forgive him a spot of hubris - watch this space...) What did you get up to to celebrate the short flowering of the Snow Season?

Wolf Man Again

I went down last night to try to catch some of Wolf Man being shot (most of the shooting is at night for fairly obvious reasons...) Annoyingly I couldn't get very close but could see that it's WELL worth going down and having a nosey if you can - especially today/night - about more of which later. The whole of the central path has been made into a "road", complete with trees, lamp posts and sundry shops/ signs etc.

I went down again this morning to get a closer look at the set. It's all 'put away to one side,' but you can see quite a lot and the security men are desperate to chat about it to anyone who passes by. The extra 'walls and gates' are made out of wood - but even up close they're very convincing. Seems rather a shame to think they'll all go on the bonfire afterwards.




You can get very close during the day, and that might be a good time to see stuff. This afternoon they'll be rehearsing a stunt where a guy (the Wolf Man?) will leap from the tower above the Painted Hall. It will be shot tonight.

The best place to see it by night seems to be the Thames Path, by the King's Steps. From the street there are giant arc lights between the set and the public which make the Nosey Parker's job more difficult, but the path, though a long way away, has a clear-ish view. I also stood at the Park Row end, looking from the gates, but got quite a lot of hassle from a very jumped-up security guard.

Luckily most of them are lovely and have really got into the spirit of the thing. One of them gave me a very graphic description of the Wolf Man's make up (including actions and faces...) and 'hydraulic springs'(the mind boggles) attached to his feet.

I commented that it must be the biggest set I'd seen but the chap at the gate told me with much glee that both National Treasure 2 (now there's a rubbish film...) and The Duchess (out in the summer) were bigger. Nevertheless, well over £150m is being lavished on Wolf Man.

Also lovely were the extras (over 170 of them last night, I was told) who were happy to pose for me, even though I was clambering up the wall and clinging onto the railings to get the shot.
Do get down and see this free show while you can - today, especially, seems like a good opportunity. Then we can all sit in the cinema at Wolf Man and point and shout "that's Greenwich" every five seconds, to the annoyance of everyone else.

The Phantom Shopping List

Folks I'm being called away over the next couple of weekends - just as stuff in Greenwich is hotting-up. So I have a favour to ask you. There are at least three events I'm gutted to be missing - so if anyone gets any pictures, I'd be really keen to see them...

1) Plaque unveiling, The Spread Eagle, Sunday 6th.

Dick Moy was one of Life's characters - and a Greenwich fixture. Without his efforts in the 60s and 70s it would be a very different place. Indeed the landscape of the town has changed since he died a year or so ago; some would say not for the better. A plaque to his memory is being placed on the wall of the Spread Eagle Restaurant, his old gaff, on Sunday. I don't know the time of it, but I'm sure someone here does.

2) The Olympic Flame reaching The O2.

About 6.00pm on Sunday 6th, if it's not delayed by large amounts of people in orange (ironic really - if the Dome was sponsored by a different phone company, the government could pass the protesters off as an advertising stunt...) I'm suspecting that at least a few people will be ingenious enough to evade the police, and any pics that will embarrass the Chinese government will be welcome here...

3) I really can't believe I'm missing the London Marathon on Sunday 13th. . It feels very wrong indeed to know I won't be there - I find it hard to think back to a time when it wasn't part of my Greenwich year.

The bit I'm most disappointed about will be Lloyd Scott who, even if the name doesn't ring a bell at first, will be known to you. He's the guy who wore a deep sea diver's costume, complete with lead boots and brass mask and took about a week to finish a few years ago. The miserable marathon gits refused to give him a finisher's certificate, but last time I was in the National Maritime Museum, his outfit was in there with a special label, so I guess he got the last laugh.

Last year, he went as Indiana Jones, dragging a whopping-great rock behind him, and this year, this year, he's got an amazing-looking costume - he's going as the Iron Giant.

He'll be on stilts inside a massive tin-man outfit, (9ft x 4ft) complete with flashing eyes and moving robot parts, which will slow him down considerably, but probably still not enough for me to get back in time to see him. There's no estimate of how long he'll take to get to Greenwich on the website, but if any of you get any pictures - especially if he's against some fabbo local background (who knows - that Wolf Man set might still be there - now that would be surreal...) - I'd love to see them.

Of course there's bound to be other great stuff going on and if I've missed an event out, don't feel I don't want to know about it...

Wolf Man

Apparently this Wolf Man set is just ENORMOUS. I've not made it down there yet - they were just building it when I was last there - I'll try to go today - but Stevie has sent me some pics - and they are staggering...

1. For One Night Only - pretty much literally...


2. Your carriage awaits...


3. Techies unloading crashmats for an action sequence - falling horses, crazy stunts, Jackie Chan...Well, maybe not the last one...




4. Stevie says: "I wonder what the original man on the Clapham Omnibus would make of it all. Last time I saw this location on TV Harrison Ford was involved in a shooting match with Sean Bean. Today the wayfare has been covered over in authentic roadage for the Edwardian era and two vintage omnibus are on standby for the evening's shoot when they'll be crammed full of period attired extras."

5. "Artists Dressing Rooms - the biggest name on the movie is Anthony Hopkins but he'll have his work cut out for him competing with the equine talent on the movie. Up to 40 horses are being used..."

So, an eyeful and no mistake guv. Get down there now, folks, for a free show...

RAF Flypast

Yesterday, the RAF celebrated its 90th birthday. To celebrate, a stunning 'flypast' was created, covering much of the London Thames. To my great sadness, I was unable to see it, but Dazza has come to my rescue, sending me some scorching photos. I'll leave them to speak for themselves. As usual, click on them to make them bigger...

Free Guided Walk

Franklin has sent me the details of a very curious-looking walk about undergound Greenwich on Sunday, which I'll pop on the Parish News page (don't forget to keep looking there - I do occasionally put local things in it) - I'm writing about it here as it's very short notice. Look out also for the Friends of East Greenwich Pleasance's Easter fun activities.

Your Phantom is gutted - I'm going a-visiting-relatives this weekend and will miss it all - sometimes it just has to happen. Enjoy yourselves whatever Easter-y stuff you end up doing...

Froghog Day

Would you believe it - after my post of total tosh yesterday - great fun to write but not a word of it true, there actually IS a local day celebrating amphibians this week!

I've just read in Mary Mills's newsletter that this Sunday, the 9th, is apparently "Frog Day" at Greenwich Peninsula Ecology Centre where (presumably kiddies) can make fun frogs, badges and go on a treasure hunt. Info Joanne 020 8239 1904. The item ends with the statement "This is the Year of the Frog," proving that you really cannot make it up...

BTW if you don't get Mary's newsletter - which is always worth reading even if I don't ever see any contributions from the other two councillors who are supposedly involved - I am sure she'd be delighted to add you to her list. Email her at mary.mills@greenwich.gov.uk

Natural Wedding Venues

Is it just me or does that title just sound ever-so slightly racy?
But back to the question...

Philippa asks:

My fiancee and I are getting married on the 5th July. We're having our reception at the new site of the Hangar Arts Trust - a giant circus warehouse in Woolwich. To contrast with this, I really want to have a ceremony (more of a blessing and readings than anything legal due to location) somewhere beautiful and natural, like a wood or a garden. I wondered whether you might have any suggestions as to places we could hire or look at?

The Phantom replies:

Congratualtions, Philippa! I'm intrigued about the Hangar Arts Place - I haven't come across it before. I agree that having a contrast is a good idea. Not least because most of the really wild places will be free.

There's always the ancient Oxleas Wood - containing many possible sites within - worth finding a place beforehand and getting someone to meet your guests and lead them there rather than playing hunt-the-venue. Alternatively, if it's a really relaxed affair, you could actually make it a treasure hunt, leaving clues among the bushes and under stones. Just be prepared for people to arrive in dribs and drabs.

The garden at the Royal Observatory is popular - you may be able to hire it - though presumably there will be rather a lot of onlookers.

Talking of onlookers, some friends of mine who are pagans had a handfasting at the stone circle in Hilly Fields Park in Brockley. Since it was a Saturday afternoon in summer, the dress code was thankfully not "skyclad" (phew) but there was still plenty for saucer-eyed small boys on bicycles to enjoy.

There's always the little gorse-filled hollow at the top of Maze Hill - what the whole of Blackheath must have looked like once. There is the occasional burnt-out car there, but mostly it'svery peaceful, quiet and reasonably private.

How about at the foot of Severndroog Castle? Or among the ruins of Lesnes Abbey? In exchange for cash, you might be able to persuade the residents of Trinity Hospital along the Thames Path to let you use their back garden. I don't know. But The Fan Museum's garden is definitely available for hire, and of course, there's an indoors if it rains.

Another indoor place that you might like to look at would be the Winter Gardens at Avery Hill Park in Eltham. Or if you really want to push the boat out, there's always Eltham Palace. It gets very booked up, but Saturdays are reserved for weddings. The gorgeous palace is fabulous and the gardens are also great, but if you want "natural," cross the little wooden bridge and wander into the less heavily tended areas. It's administered by English Heritage, who also hire out Rangers House at extortionate rates.

Charlton House is cheaper (and though not quite as glamorous, still a lovely place. The grounds, if extensive aren't that exciting however.) Hall Place is currently under restoration (though the gardens are eye-popping - the turf maze would have been fun) as is Woodlands House in Westcombe Park (the gardens are nicely shady) but Danson House will be open. The grounds are only so-so but the house is good.

I am sure people will have some more suggestions...

A Murder of Crows

Benedict's Murder of Crows...

Benedict points out the sudden onslaught of Spring:

I'm often suprised to see a murder of crows on the clock tower, usually in the autumn, but the unseasonaly early spring weather has instigated an unprecidented conflagration. Any ideas?

The Phantom replies:

That is one enigmatically highbrow epistle, Benedict. Did you actually mean to write to The Times? The Phantom is currently donning tweeds and a deerstalker to pen a worthy reply ;-)

Indeed Spring is portentiously early this year, perhaps, one might suppose, to render some recompense for the failure last year, of Primavera to peer in April's front at all...

...Phew - I can't keep that up for much longer. By the way, I love the collective noun. Did you know that, according to Wikipedia (which is never wrong, of course) you could also have used cauldron, caucus, congress, cowardice, hover, murder, muster, parcel, or storytelling when referring to crows?

But back to Spring. I did notice the daffs were fully in bloom in the National Maritime Museum yesterday, and that a pair of blackbirds are getting it together behind my gaff, warm spring days replacing the need for flowers, chocolates and Barry White Albums.

Any more springlike indcations folks? Sightings of yellowhammers or recordings of the first cuckoo should be addressed to The Editor...

A Glittering Night With The Stars

Yes folks, it's Award-Season again...

....which is my cue to get out of the house by whatever means necessary and do practically anything rather than switch on the telly.

Ever since I heard about them, I've fancied the Observatory's alternative Nights With the Stars, which are run after dark in a deserted Greenwich Park. Astronomers, complete with beards, anoraks and glasses (i.e. real astronomers) take small groups of curious gawpers like me up to the giant onion-dome, which is majestically opened to allow the giant refractor telescope a free rein at the endles skies.

As I walked through a silent, blackened Park, despite the fact that it was still only about 6.30pm, I confess I kept to the middle of the paths. As a Royal Park, Greenwich isn't allowed to have any streetlights, a welcome patch of darkness in a busy London spatter of sodium, neon and halogen. It was eerie - and not eerie - at the same time. It doesn't matter how well you know a place, by night when there's no one else there, a place with that much history both above and below ground is bound to give a sensitive Phantom an edgy feel.

I tried not to look above my head, tried to convince myself that the dense cloud above me was going to magically disperse, but as the foghorn on the rangers' van announced to the last few stragglers that the park was closing and the tiny train brought some more attendees for the event (apparently that's how I was supposed to have arrived too - after dark everyone has to come in via regulated National Maritime Museum channels) it was quite clear the night was officially overcast.

They seem to be quite well set-up for such eventualities. Presumably this is a regular occurance. They started us off in the Planetarium with a live-commentary overview of the heavens, with particular reference to that night - where - if there had actually been a clear sky - we could find the various constellations, planets and man-made objects. Mars was pointed out so that we could look for it ourselves sometime - and given times and dates for other good things to see.

Then we all trekked across to the famous onion-shaped dome (it's the only one in the world, you know - created that shape because when the original -smaller - telescope was replaced, the new one was too big to sit in the building. They didn't have the cash to rebuild it all so just the dome was replaced) where two more astronomers told us the history of the place and the instruments - much of which was 20th Century stuff that I didn't know much about, so I was a happy Phantom. They took us through a video taken from the telescope on a night when it was actually clear and discussed all the stuff we would have seen.

It was a consolation prize, and as consolation prizes go, it wasn't bad at all. They made the best of what could have been a disappointing evening - and even if they didn't actually open the roof of the dome, actually being in there at night, freezing cold, and listening to people who know what they're talking about gave me a good feel of how it must have been in years past.

Now I have a problem. These evenings get heavily booked up - and I am sure that when you can actually see something it is a wonderful experience. I thoroughly enjoyed my one visit - but what I'd really like to do now is actually look through the big telescope. It's about £15 a ticket, and much as I enjoyed last time, I don't really want to do exactly the same thing again if it's going to be cloudy. There's a series of evenings looking at Saturn coming up, but would I be better off waiting for summer when it's more likely to be clear?

Hmm. While I'm pondering, you might like to take a look yourself. It's certainly worth it, whatever the weather, for the first time at least. Find information here

Planning Ahead for Open House Day

Benedict has mentioned something that has escalated an idea that's been smouldering at the back of my mind since September.

Benedict writes:

As I look out of my studio and wonder what the time is (my watch stopped 5 years ago) I gaze up to see the reliable Greenwich Clock Tower and see its time to stop my doodling and banging. Then I get to thinking wouldn't it be great to go up it! It seems to have some sort of glazed viewing gallery or room at the top. Have you ever been or know anyone that has been up there, I bet the views are spectacular! It could be a great attraction to rival the imminent new Wheel, they could light it up at night and have a restaurant at the top. I love having this handy kitchen clock and its minimal/deco/post-modern design out the back door but can't find out anything about it.

When we talked about this last year, no one had ever been up what was very clearly an observation tower. And it occurs to me that it would be the perfect candidate for Open House Day - a magnificent example of that civic-deco style of building of the 1930s - and surely not that hard to open. If we started now, maybe we could draw the attentions of the organisers to its charms.

But it doesn't just stop there. There are at least two more buildings in the heart of Greenwich that I'd utterly love to see open for the day (well actually I wouldn't be terribly upset if they opened a couple of them for more than a day...)

The first is the Power Station. Contrary to popular belief, it's not abandoned - it's still working. And I've wanted to see inside it ever since I met a security guard having a quiet fag outside. Must be amazing in there - but at the moment it has the grubby allure of a parallel-universe Wonka Chocolate Factory.

The second is the roof of Greenwich Observatory. It's flat - people can go up there - and just think of those views.

Each of these buildings have great architectural beauty in their own ways. The Observatory has true historic value but the power station - well - I can't even begin to think what industrial treasures lie inside there.

I can't find any specific information on how to suggest buildings on the Open House website but I'm sure an email to them will give us some ideas. It may require lobbying...

Anyone got any other pet buildings they'd like to nose around (sorry - appreciate the architectural merit of...)

Free TV Food in Greenwich Market

Ok, so I spend most of my time trying not to be a parish noticeboard, but this guy asked so nicely and it does involve free food, so I'm doing this just the once...

Ricochet (http://www.ricochet.co.uk/) are a TV company who, it would seem, specialise in lifestyle programmes - you know the sort of thing - reality stuff, property porn - and foodie shows.

They're putting together an "exciting" new one - they're not admitting to the title - part of which will be filmed in Greenwich Market TOMORROW between 10.30am and 4.00pm. They're looking for people to turn up and be 'crowds' in the background and the hook is the 20 chefs who are going to be cooking there and doling out the results of their new recipes.

There's always loads of hanging around at these things so I would recommend that you don't bowl up too early or you'll freeze. But if you wrap up warm and don't expect a banquet it could be fun - if you're not already washing your hair...

Comings and Goings 2007

This time of year there's always a 'review' of what went on over the past 12 months in whichever piece of media you care to read, and I don't like being left out. I don't usually get myself too embroiled with local news, so if you want a serious overview of kittens up trees and pensioners outraged at rubbish in parks, you'll just have to check out the local papers. I thought I'd look at one or two of my favourite comings and goings of 2007. In many ways just as trivial, but it's our trivia...

Comings and Goings

Well, hello-ooo...

Frisbee in Greenwich Park So how's that one going, then, fit folk?

The Spread Eagle The aggressive refit isn't to everyone's taste, and yes, if it were me I would have kept it as it was. But the food is good and Dick Moy's paintings are fabulous.

The Alamo. Utter crap. See below.

Buenos Aires Restaurant A strong contender for my favourite opening of 2007. A superb restaruant. Shame it's in Blackheath...

The O2 On first appearances this seems to be a success, even if for most of us, most of the time, it's somewhere 'other people' go. What really needs some work is the transport infrastructure so that we can actually get on the buses during and after events...

Point Zero A perfectly acceptable Polish cafe.

Channers Almost next door to Point Zero and Alacosta and virtually opposite The Trafalgar Cafe, this seemed to be trying to reinvent the wheel, and as such, appears to have struggled a bit. A shame really as they really looked like they were trying hard. I was walking past the other day and noticed they were having a refit - within 6 months of their original opening. Whether this will be enough remains to be seen.

So Organic Does what it says on the tin. Organic Lovely Stuff.

The Fishmonger Ltd A fine addition indeed to the coterie of Greenwich Shops.

The Peter Harrison Planetarium Greenwich's latest cultural addition. Not quite what we were promised, according to inside sources, but still well worth a visit. If you have any mince pounds left, go soon and get money off your ticket.

Bombay Bicycle Club The arrival of the upmarket curry delivery service was much-anticipated. It's lovely food, a bit on the pricey side.

Bizili A new art materials shop from a slightly strange Chinese multinational. Could be good, but hasn't reached anything like its potential yet.

The Rose and Crown A classy refit for this popular gay pub.

The Powder Monkey. An unpopular refit of The Cricketers. See below.

The Thames Clipper service has four new boats. I wouldn't say I'm now a regular, but I've used it four times since November and it's fab. Never actually seen the coffee bar open though.

The Post Shop in The High Road is a big improvement on its grey and dingy predecessor - bright and useful and full of stuff you might need. It should not have to replace all the other branches in Greenwich though. I understand they had to get planning permission to put the post box back outside, which I find staggering.

Ginza Now you're talking. A Japanese restaurant at the 'wrong' end of town which actually rocks. Excellent food, beautifully presented with extremely (almost too) attentive service. Yessss.

IndigO2 A bad name for a good music venue. Expensive but classy new joint I will be more than happy to visit in the future.

Live Advent Calendar. A fantastic idea. I utterly loved the concept and most of the windows were amazing. I look forward to it becoming an annual thing - I can see a point in the future where getting a 'date' will be a huge honour and preparations will assume Rio Carnival heights - where people start planning their next year's window on Jan 2nd... Come to think of it a carnival would be great too. Well done everyone - lovely stuff.

Much Lamented:

The Meeting House One of the big tragedies of my year was losing this honest little caff. What it has morphed into is hideous beyond belief.

Marcet Books

Just the latest in a line of tiny secondhand bookshops tucked in little corners of Greenwich to bite the dust. It was only when all the books were actually carted out of there that one was able to see that it wasn't that small a shop. Warwick Leadlay has taken over the place and opened it as a gallery which is definitely the least worst option. I like Warwick Leadlay's shop and he actually gives a damn. If I can't have a dusty little bookshop there then he's the next best option. The guy in there told me that there were so many books stored in the basement underneath that if, by any slim chance, the floor had collapsed, it wouldn't have gone very far...

Unmourned:

The Alamo One of the most bog-awful places I have ever eaten at. Apparently the rest of the world agreed as it didn't even last 'til the Christmas rush. Appalling. I just hope they don't try again with something else. What would work there with a kitchen that size would be good quality coffee and pre-cinema snacks. Nothing bigger.

Pizza Luna This, without a doubt was the worst restaurant in Greenwich, beating the Alamo into a cocked hat, but only narrowly missing Tai Won Mein. I am truly grateful to see it go, if only for the embarrassment I felt knowing unsuspecting foreign visitors were trying to eat there, thinking it was representative of Britain. Appalling.

The Powder Monkey. The perhaps unwise decision to try to trendy-up the gay scene after having taken away The Gloucester Arms saw the opening - and shutting of The Powder Monkey within a few months. It is now to be "The W Lounge" (wonder what the "W" stands for. Don't go for cheap laughs, now...) We'll see...

The Old Friends That this place has closed upsets me not one jot. But as a dead pub it is even more of a shambles than it was when it was alive. With the coming of the "Heart for East Greenwich" (I'm shuddering a little, but still have my fingers crossed) couldn't someone take this place and do something lovely with it? Greenwich Meantime Brewery, perhaps..?

Not long for this world:

Flying Duck Enterprises The loss of this place will be a tragedy for the town - a seriously big nail in the coffin of quirkiness which already teeters on the grave of Greenwich's independent shops. I don't know the exact reason they're going - but I understand the clientele of the hideous Wetherspoons (no chance of that being closed) has much to do with it. I hear rumour they're going to Brighton. Frankly Brighton has so many of these shops already I think they'd do better just upping sticks a short way and opening somewhere else in Greenwich. But I wish them luck whatever they do. They will be sorely missed.

East Greenwich Post Office On its way out, after a lacklustre refurb.

La Salumeria A sad thing, losing a classic, untrendy, just-good deli. When I was in there on Christmas Eve though, I asked how long they thought they'd still be there and the lady laughed and said they way the sale was going they'd still be there next Christmas. They are currently trying to sell it as a going concern. I just hope someone bites...

Not Dead Yet:

The Cutty Sark The poor old girl's in trouble, but she's still just about breathing. It's down to us to keep her going. I'll be actively seeking out ways to support the fighting fund next year.

East Greenwich Gas Holder. One worth fighting for. If we lose this, we effectively lose pretty much all of our visible industrial history on the Peninsula (I'm not counting the businesses which still quietly go on along the river - we can't see them from the new builds - and it's important to be visually reminded where history comes from) and may as well just become another dormitory. I'll be banging on more about this much more next year. You have been warned.

The Coffee Cellar The owner of this fine little cafe has been poorly recently, Scared of Chives tells me, and it's been closed. So when it reopens, we all need to visit lots to cheer him up, or we'll lose this little 60s gem too

Merry Christmas Everyone

No one wants to read loads of stuff on Christmas Day, so today, I'll just leave you with a selection of seasonal Greenwich pictures.



Happy Christmas, All

The Painted Hall with Yew


Theatre of Wine's Advent window

Greenwich Market

Greenwich Ice Rink

A bench in Greenwich Park

The puppet stall, Greenwich market

The Planetarium's first snow - before it even opened

Greenwich Ice Rink (again)

The Painted Hall (again)

Greenwich Eye

Hey - I just read in the Mercury that the go-ahead has been given for an observation wheel a la The London Eye next summer - just for the summer months, outside the Pepys Centre. I know grump-mongers moaned about this and it got rejected at first but I for one am delighted the decision has been overturned. We can debate forever about whether it would have been an even better view from Blackheath but I just don't buy that it would be a terrible eyesore when you look at all the (permanent) construction going on around here just now. I think it's fantastic news. You'll have to elbow me out of the way if you want front place in the queue...

Nativity Procession?

Ruth asks:

I heard a rumour that there is some kind of nativity procession in Blackheath tomorrow. Can you shed any light on this? I've tried searching for details on the web but can't find anything.

The Phantom replies:

Me either. Sounds nice - but I don't think it's had much in the way of publicity. Anyone know anything about it?

New Years Eve Revisited

A different Joe asks:

Are you aware of any events/ good places to go on NYE this year in Greenwich? We're looking for something thats quite lively and friendly and ideally a local crowd.. Ideally a good pub/ bar that you could recommend? We don't really want to go to anything thats run by Inc..
Have you got any ideas on venues or events?

The Phantom replies:

I've been pondering on this one - after Claire asked a similar question about a good place to see fireworks that night.

I've been looking around at some websites but they're mainly staying a bit tight-lipped about NYE. The Vanbrugh, The Ashburnham Arms, The Hill, The Plume of Feathers, The Kings Arms - none of them are admitting to having anything on that night - but I'll bet my boots they will have - I'd pick a nice one, walk in and ask if I were you...

There's an interesting-looking bash going on at Blackheath Halls - a sort of Back to the Future party - Enchantment Under the Sea which looks fun, and if you want to push the boat out, Indig02 is having a big old party with Take That and the Sugarbabes.

Does anyone else know of any good ones?

New Year's Eve

Claire asks:

Are there any fireworks/street celebrations going on the Greenwich for News years eve this year?I'm trying to find an alternative to going to a party...

The Phantom replies:

I don't know of any official ones, but there are good vantage points to watch the ones around the London Eye and they often become meeting points for people to get together for unofficial street parties. The Point is an obvious one, as is Maze Hill just outside Vanbrugh Castle. Such a shame that Greenwich Park isn't open at night. Standing on Blackheath gives you a good panoramic view of South London, and there's always loads of fireworks going on at midnight on Dec 31st in South London (and every other night of the year, some might say...)

The 02 is planning a massive party with Sugarbabes and Take That, and I'd be surprised if they don't do something spectacular for the rest of us to watch. Hi-jacking other people's fireworks is a great idea - all the enjoyment, none of the expense.

Blackheath Halls seem to be doing quite an interesting bash based on Back to the Future - http://www.blackheathhalls.com/

Advent Window Number One

Folks - it's begun - The St Alfege's Live Advent calendar goes - well - live from today. For those of you who haven't been paying attention, you can read about it here.

So (big drum roll...) today's window can be found at:

Greenwich Printmakers in Greenwich Market.

The theme is "Reflections."

Enjoy!

100 Cauliflowers revisited.

Andy has sent me a mail about this oddest of installations currently on at the Peninsula.

As I'm always bleating on, I don't really want to be a parish noticeboard but this one is so bonkers that I've just got to mention it here...

He writes:

This Friday 23rd and Saturday 24th November, environmental artist Kerry Morrison is inviting you all to come and see (and take part in)her '100 cauliflowers' installation on the peninsula. The installation is a culmination of work over the past 6 months, inwhich Kerry researched the areas environmental history and issues, andworked with some local people to develop ideas.

Kerry has been building the 'allotment' this week, and on Friday 23rd she will be joined by 15 pupils from John Roan School to plant the first 50 cauliflowers. this will take place between 1pm and 3pm. On Saturday 24th, come along between 12noon and 3pm to help plant the remaining 50 cauliflowers.

The plot, known as the 'bowling green' is on the riverside path between GMV and the O2.

The caulis will overwinter and be harvested in the spring, possibly towards some kind of community feast.

www.independentphotography.org.uk/urbannature

The Phantom says:

I'll try to get down there at some point - maybe some of you fancy it too. Just don't invite me to any community 'feast' consisiting of cauliflowers, eh?

Christmas Bazaars

Gethyn asks:

Do you know of any christmas bazaars/fairs taking place in greenwich/blackheath this weekend?

The Phantom replies:

I'm sorry to report that The Westcombe Society's Dickensian Fair was last week, I'm afraid, (though do try to make next year's if you can) and I can't find any news about either the Blackheath or Greenwich Societies doing anything similar. If any of you know of any fairs this weekend, do let me know! Of course the weekend after, The Friends of East Greenwich Pleasaunce will be having a little carol and mulled wine event on the 2nd December - but that's not really a fair as such.

Hmm. Maybe someone knows of a school fair or two?

Clash of the Titans

"Big" King Tut v. "The Emperor"

Round One: British Museum. Round Two: The O2

A heavyweight cultural clash this season sees two hitherto undisputed champs take on each other in the London ring for the first time.

In the Blue Corner we have relative newcomer "Emperor" Qin Shihuangdi, whose fanbase, the barmy "Terracotta Army" will literally follow him to the ends of the earth. Discovered in 1974, he's received rave reviews and his sheer size should prove an interesting match for Big Tut.

Warming up in the Red Corner we have the perennial crowd favourite, King "The Boy" Tutankhamun. Still in good form after 3,000 years; some pundits have noted he's looking a little flabby around the midriff these days. We've seen Tutmania before - can he pull it off again?

Get your front row seats now to watch these two heavyweights slug it out to the death...

Dong! Round One:

The First Emperor

Form: Unknown. Only discovered in 1974 and no major exhibition in Britain before.

Weight: 20 figures + sundry grave goods.

Performance: Beautifully displayed in The Round Reading Room. Each warrior fabulously presented and close enough to (almost) touch. Fabulously displayed and well-lit. Scholarly but entertaining. Emphasis on life at the Imperial Court, including leisure and bureaucratic figures as well as the more famous military images. Clerks and musicians, animals and birds supplement the more famous terracotta soldiers. One of the most memorable parts is the contrast between the first figure - a crouching archer - and the last - a modern replica coloured as it would have originally have been. An extraordinary experience.

Extras: Large screens with filmic representations of the life of the First Emperor.

Rounds: Takes about an hour and a half.

Odds: Entry - £ 12 adults, children over 16, £ 10 Children under 16 free

Memorabilia: Classic British Museum mementos - t-shirts, mugs, books etc.

Knockout? Absolutely.

Verdict: The future for this guy is exciting indeed. Only a tiny part of the Terracotta Army itself has been unearthed so far; and virtually none of the rest of Qin Shihuangdi's