Happy Kerb Stone…

For any fans of The Sad Kerb Stone like Stephen and myself, I have good news. If you don’t know what the Sad Kerb Stone is, don’t worry, nor do we. It’s been sitting alone in the foreground of the Queens House for years, ignored and neglected but clearly ‘wrong’ in the middle of formal landscaping.

and what I love about it is that it seems to be there in spite of everything – whatever they do to that piece of ground, it always remains. It doesn’t act as edging, it doesn’t have any earth-management position, it doesn’t seem to be left over from landscaping, it’s just there.

Stephen and I have enjoyed it quietly for years, but we really thought that once the Olympics came it would be swept away with all the rest of anything that didn’t fit – and, for a while we thought it had.

But incredibly, it’s managed to sit the whole thing out. In the middle of all that craziness, probably squatting between hospitality marquees or something – perhaps everyone thought everyone else thought it was important – and it remained.

But then we thought – well, with all the post-Olympic re-landscaping, surely it’s going to go now.

But no. Someone has included it in the new edging despite its ‘wrong’ size and now it’s no longer a lonesome stone – it has little friends. And a job. Soon it will even have grass around it.

The recession must be turning when even the long-term unemployed can find a gainful career…


the attachments to this post:

kerbstone after low
kerbstone after low

kerbstone before low
kerbstone before low

kerb alone low
kerb alone low


3 Comments to “Happy Kerb Stone…”

  1. Kate says:

    That’s brilliant. It must have some kind of symbolism for it to remain there for so long. Maybe some grounds keeper has a story to tell about it?

  2. Pieter van der Merwe, NMM says:

    Not symbolism, just Newton’s first law of motion, that things continue as they are until acted on by net force. This ‘objet trouv√©’ is a side remnant from one of two granite-set speed-humps put in the NMM cross-grounds roadway in the early ’90s, as a result of a passing H&S scare about pedestrian safety: passing, in that they were later removed as a far greater pedestrian trip-hazard and impediment to wheelchair passage when the Disability Discrimination Act came in. (Yes…you may think so, but I couldn’t possibly comment further.) The crew who laid the new post-Olympic granite edging up toit didn’t ask if it should have stayed: at least they didn’t until after the concrete had set, so (if you do) enjoy its survival, at least for the time being.

    The better story is about similar bumps on the road immediately behind the Queen’s House, also long gone. At an evening corporate event, related to a TV advert made on site by Jaguar in the early 90s, either the Chairman, M-D, or similar company ‘suit’ decided to show off one of the latest models, of which they had a few present, for the benefit of some glamorous girl he want to impress. It was well after dark but’Get in and I’ll give you a ride’, says he. He then roared off across the back of the House, failed to see the unlit ‘sleeping policemen’ and took out the sump of ¬£35K-plus of high-end Jag. However, one had to admire his style, since he just got out, turned to a minion and said,’Bring me another.’

  3. Absolutely brilliant – so the happy kerbstone is actually a little piece of crap history! Even better. It now HAS to stay for the sheer historicalness of it.

    Love the story about the Jaguar guy.

    I wonder if the girl was impressed…